Key Verse: “We are tearing down arguments and every high thing (walls) built up against the knowledge of God; and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5
What follows is a strong lesson. Not strong in the sense of boastfulness; strong in the sense of content that deals with very hard subjects many of us as men work to avoid or sidestep. I concluded this lesson may not be for all men. Here is a quick test to determine if it is worth your time to read on.
If you never felt rejection, experienced isolation, or dealt with depression, you may safely hit the Delete key. This lesson is not for you. Move on to the next message in your bulging Inbox.
However as your eyes glanced over each of those key words, if you felt a twinge in your gut or the sting of a painful remembrance you hoped would never resurface, perhaps the Holy Spirit has something to say to you. So keep reading, please.
On many occasions I have written to you concerning the fact Christian men face a fierce enemy, Satan, the devil, and that according to Jesus Himself. Don’t take my word for it. David wrote, “The fool has said in his heart, “There is no God.”” I don’t think it irreverent or extra-biblical to also write only a foolish man believes there is no Satan. Jesus talked about him so many times, how could we not believe? Satan first appears (Genesis 3) in the serpent and plagues men throughout biblical history to the very end. (Revelation 20:10) Jesus called Satan a number of things during His ministry, among them “thief”.
“The thief (Satan) comes only to steal, kill, and destroy….” John 10:10
Keep these words in mind as we consider three walls our fierce enemy attempts to build in the hearts and minds of men, particularly Christian men. His end is destruction. Destroy our testimony. Destroy our effectiveness in spiritual warfare. If Satan went after Jesus from the cradle to the Cross, he (his forces) will surely continue the onslaught against us regardless of how strong we think we are. Powerful Christian men and pastors have fallen on their own swords succumbing to such relentless attacks.
For the balance of this lesson, we are going to examine three areas Satan uses in our lives that cause us to build walls God never intended and the ultimate consequence of doing so. Then we will see how, as Christians, we are empowered to tear down those walls and rebuild new ones according to the will and mighty hand of God. I hope you hang in there with me. This is not easy plowing, but it does yield fruit.
Walls that lead to the destruction of men: Rejection → Isolation → Depression
This is not a psychological treatise on anything as I am not trained in that way. I am a senior biblical Christian man called to reach and teach men from all walks of life the Truth that first saves, equips, and builds. But sometimes we have to tear down that which was built by false gods or demonic influence even when we were totally unaware it was happening. Did I mention the enemy is subtle and cunning above all other created beings? That is why Jesus also called him the “deceiver”.
As we progress through this lesson, I hope you will look back over your life and ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes to truth you never saw or accepted. Sadly, for all of us, no matter how we were raised and regardless of zip code, much of the stuff we use to build these walls was supplied by family and friends. Later in life, the manure is often supplied by peers, co-workers, and all forms of social media. Lies or hurtful word and deeds that tear us down and cause us to build wrong walls that lead only to destruction. My dear brother, God never intended this.
Rejection. We remember the feeling of rejection. It hurts. It wounds. Yet, it is a part of life. Rejection comes first in our family. Words or deeds that send wrong messages what we say or think does not matter. A dad or mom walk away, and, as kids, we blame ourselves. Devastating rejection.
Then we begin to face peers. Not getting picked by the team we wanted to play for, being chosen last, or not at all. As we move into adolescence, it could be rejection by the ‘cool’ kids. Maybe we did not fit in or wear the right clothes, come from the right ‘hood. The student gov elections where all your friends said they would vote for you and none did. Getting turned down by the girl you wanted to date. How many times can she say she has to wash her hair!?
For those who do not learn to handle or process rejection well, it does not get easier as we move into manhood. Not getting our dream job or no job at all. Being terminated. Socially, our overtures to become part of a group are rebuffed. Perhaps the worst form, divorce, or issues with our kids.
A bold, small percent of men let rejection roll off like water on a duck’s back. Some are able to process it reasonably well – forgive, forget, and move on. Others require professional help to do so and that is good. When you need it, get it! Feelings of rejection left unattended fester like an infected splinter and lead men to begin building the second wall, isolation.
Isolation. Most are familiar with the phrase, “No man is an island.” That statement is not original. On the sixth day of His creation process, God said, “It is not good for man to be alone.” (Genesis 2: 18) This profoundly, powerful statement says it all when we talk about Loneliness is not a desired place for God’s people. Yet for reasons including and beyond rejection, we go there at times. We cannot stay there and remain healthy. To do so, leads further down the path to destruction.
Consider both ends of our lives. Even as babies we knew when we were left alone, and we did not like it! When the side of the crib was raised, lights turned off, and door closed behind mom or dad, it was time to sound the alarm. Cry as loud as you could for as long as you could until we were once again reunited with those arms that brought security. Only over time with strong reassurances from Mom or Dad, and our primal need for sleep, did we finally learn to tolerate isolation. But not for long.
On the other end of life, about four years ago just before my dad went Home to be with the Lord, I made the decision my parents could no longer live in the home they knew for more than forty-five years, the only home they ever owned after Dad retired from the Navy. But health and distance made that decision clear. Within a month, my dad, already under hospice care, went Home. That left my mom alone after nearly 65 years of marriage, two wars, and three kids.
Like so many from that generation, she began to retreat into isolation, getting too comfortable with being alone in her room at the assisted living facility. Socialization is the area senior facilities work on the most with their residents. They work hard to try to keep them engaged in activities even if it is no more than coming out to join others watching television. Experience taught them (and those of us dealing with this issue) many who choose to remain in isolation eventually sink into depression.
My dear brother, this also applies to you and me. Perhaps you have been there. We decide it is not worth the effort to seek acceptance of others or the help we need. Just as some seniors do, we slip slowly into that deep chasm known as depression, a stronghold not easily broken.
Depression can be the deepest chasm this side of Hell. Many who suffer from it consider it hell on earth. If you never suffered from this crippling, often debilitating, condition, you are blessed more than you will ever realize. The Bible makes many references to godly men who were “depressed” by their circumstances or longstanding suffering, among them Job, David, Jeremiah, Nehemiah, and the Apostle Paul. The same word is used of Jesus Himself in the Garden. (Matthew 26:37) One translation reads, “Jesus was sorrowful and deeply depressed ” We know He pressed through for our sakes.
The takeaway is simply this: men of God were depressed, and there is no shame in that. Sadly for the one suffering, and sinfully for the one judging, shame ascribed to depression has been known to come from insensitive Christians who have no idea they are “heaping burning coals” on the heads of their brothers or sisters. The Apostle Paul’s admonition fits the judge well.
“The person who thinks that he is standing strong should be careful lest he fall.” 1 Corinthians 10:12
On a personal level, I have walked through such a season with my wife and personally experienced infrequent bouts, perhaps more concerned about what others might think than I should openly admit. But if it helps someone reading this or encourages him to find help and not shame, it is a worthy confession. Twice God said the same thing through James and Peter.
“God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6, 1 Peter 5:5
What man calls “refusing to admit failure”, God calls pride. What man calls “admitting his failures”, God calls humility.
Enough said about ways Satan deceives men into building walls we think protect us that, in fact, shield us from Truth and lead to destruction. Referring back to the verse with which we began this lesson, let’s draw spiritual weapons and tear down walls remembering the “sword of the Spirit is the Word of God”.
- Tearing down the wall of rejection. These are my favorite verses on this subject. I memorized them to help when I feel rejected by men. I share them often when teaching men dealing with addictions or incarcerated. God replaces the lies of rejection of man with His acceptance and remembrance.
“But Zion said, “The LORD has forsaken me, and the Lord has forgotten me. (God replies) Can a woman forget her nursing child and have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, but I will not forget you. Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands; your walls are continually before Me.”” Isaiah 49: 14-16
- Tearing down the wall of isolation. While Satan seeks to isolate us, God reminds us He is the “friend Who sticks closer than a brother”. Our best Friend in troubled times. Eat and digest these two verses in which God our Father and Christ our Savior called us “friends”.
“…ABRAHAM BELIEVED GOD, AND IT WAS RECKONED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS, and he was called the friend of God.” James 2:23
“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15
- Tearing down the wall of depression. This is the hardest to bring down. It often requires help. Humbling ourselves to ask demonstrates wisdom not weakness. Remember great saints who came before struggled with this. In his desperation and humility, David cried out to our Father and Lord,
“I am laid low in the dust; preserve my life according to your word” Psalm 119:25
Walls we built over many years, even a lifetime, do not come down easily. But when we determine in our hearts and set our minds to begin that process, God is faithful to get out His sledge hammer and help bring them down.
This powerful verse of promise and hope written by David who built many walls in his life has comforted me many times.
“I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.” Psalm 40: 1-3
As I close this lesson, I want to take you back to the beginning to remind you of the last and most important phrase the Apostle Paul shared with us in that opening verse.
“…taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.”
One day at a time, one thought at a time,
Your desperate brother in Christ,
